By | 04.11.2018

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Dating someone from a different religion or faith is far from unusual. For others, religion is very important to them and a core part of who they are. In either case, dating across religions can bring its own challenges, but with a little bit of guidance and advice, inter-faith dating couples can develop happy, fulfilling and successful relationships. For those who identify their religion as important to them, we can see that they hold their religious beliefs and practices highly and that they expect any prospective dating partners to be respectful in this area. Completing your dating profile accurately in all areas is vital to finding reliable matches on any dating website , of course. However, if you do identify as Catholic, Protestant, Muslim or any one of the other many religions listed on the website and if your religion is important to you, then make this clear in your profile. Doing so will give you a much greater chance of finding appropriate dates and potentially lasting love.

In addition to being clear about your religion and what value you place on it, you should also consider the following advice when entering into an inter-faith relationship. Of course, this is a two-way street and your partner likewise needs to respect and acknowledge your beliefs and views too. Your religion and beliefs might be very important to you. They are part of who you are and, as such, are deserving of respect.

However, as much as you wish that your dating partner shared your views, you should never try to convert them to your faith.

If you feel that happening, take a moment to sit down together and discuss it, patiently and compassionately. For those couples that enjoy dating success and form a loving and lasting relationship, the conversation about children will almost certainly come up eventually. Perhaps at the outset of your relationship, in those first flushes of the romance, this was the furthest thing from either of your minds. If, having discussed it, you both decide to have children in an interfaith relationship, you will need to agree very early on how you foresee their upbringing in terms of religion and faith.

For example, will they be raised in one religion, or learn about both and then decide for themselves when they are old enough to do so? An interfaith marriage is like all marriages in so many ways, but is different in this one respect. The consequences for yourself and the girl you love can have reverberations that can impact the happiness of each of you.

The major issues for each of you to think about: The old romantic idea that "love conquers all" does not hold true in the real world. If it did the world rate of divorce would be a lot lower.

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When you weigh the fact that most of the couples who divorce come from homogeneous religious and ethnic backgrounds the entire issue of marriage and religious differences take on a whole new meaning. If people who come from backgrounds with shared values cannot save their marriages is there any hope for those who come from different backgrounds?

Actually, people who come from different faiths, nationalities and races can have successful marriages if they completely explore the important issues before they make the final decision to wed. The process of exploring these important issues has to do with what each considers to be of such great importance that they cannot compromise.

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For example, if you marry this girl with the expectation that the children will be raised Muslim she must completely agree or there will be major conflicts between the two of you in the future.

Generally speaking, people from different faiths can marry and succeed in staying together if they each agree on the religion they will practice or if they agree that they are not religious and do not consider themselves to be of any religious persuasion.

The key words are "if they each agree. It is much easier for couples to agree about religion if the one individual feels a lot less strongly committed to their religion of origin.

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For the individual who is not committed to a religion there is often a willingness to convert for two reasons: However, if two people each feel strongly committed to and identified with their religion of origin there is a good chance that there will be nothing but grief between them in the future if they attempt to ignore their differences. Strong commitment on the part of each complicates the questions of how to raise the children, what to do on important holy days, who will go to services and how often and, etc.

This type of gap in thinking and believing complicates relationships with extended family members such as in laws, grand parents and parents. There are tragic cases in which deeply religious families refuse to accept a new member from a different faith.

There are those situations in which each person decides to keep their religion of origin but raise the children in both faiths. In these situations, children and family celebrate all the holy days, learn about each faith and attend all the services.

I have seen many of these types of arrangements succeed quite well.

In answer to your question, you and this girl must decide what you each can and cannot live with. Each of you must understand that no one can be coerced into changing their religious affiliation and practice.

Neither one of you must have any illusions about how difficult this process of inter faith marriage can be.

2 comments

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